Is Your Wife Feeling Unappreciated? (What You Can Do)

Unhappy couple

Maybe you’ve noticed your wife feels unappreciated. Perhaps she’s said as much.

There are signs she may do that shows she’s been feeling this way and you may recognize them.

In this article I’ve listed those signs and given you 7 ways you can make her feel valued.

6 Signs your wife feels unappreciated

It might not be obvious at first as we all have our own lives to lead. But your wife may exhibit some of these signs which may show she’s feeling unloved:

1. She complains

This could be the first time you notice it. But she might actively complain that she seems to do everything around the house. Or that you don’t seem to do anything to help.

She might complain that she never seems to get out anywhere. That you both always stay at home and never do anything. You never help with the children could be another one.

If you never buy her anything or do anything nice for her, she’ll let you know and you should take note. She may have been feeling like this for a while.

She will feel very unappreciated if you don’t do anything for the special days in her life. Like her birthday or the anniversary of your marriage.

2. She goes quiet

If your wife is normally vocal in your relationship and now she’s quiet, there could be a good reason why. She may have underlying feelings of being unappreciated and they’re getting her down.

She’s probably learned that rather than speaking and expressing herself. It’s got the point where she now remains quiet despite as it’s her only course of action.

It is terrible for a wife to do this however long she’s been married. You’d have thought she could attempt to remedy the situation before going silent.

3. She feels overwhelmed

If she has to do everything around the house and the chores that involves. She’s going to start feeling as though she can’t cope with it all.

She’s feeling stress because there’s only so many hours in the day. She’s busy with everything and it goes without any thanks or appreciation.

This can often happen if she doesn’t say no or perhaps she’s a people pleaser. She needs to think about herself for once.

4. She doesn’t want to be intimate

If you don’t show any appreciation for her, she might think you don’t love her. She certainly wouldn’t feel love from you and that would affect her feelings too.

As a result, she may not want to be affectionate with you in or out of the bedroom. She won’t want to hug while watching TV and she certainly won’t want any fancy times.

Intimacy can be an important part of a relationship for both partners and when it goes, some of the love goes. All you need to do is think of her occasionally.

5. She gets frustrated

As she starts becoming unhappy in a relationship, she could begin to have feelings of frustration and impatience. She may not be the calm and happy woman you married.

If it gets bad, she’s going to start giving up trying, she’ll feel sad and anxious. There are symptoms of pent up frustration and these will become clear.

She won’t enjoy feeling this way and it could be all because she’s married to someone who doesn’t appreciate her.

6. Her eyes wander

If you don’t show that you love and are grateful for her, then maybe she will find someone else who will be. She’ll be tempted to find validation in another man.

At first she’ll just enjoy the attention, but you never know where that will lead to if you don’t do something about your attitude towards her.

She may just ask about a male friend a bit more than usual or suggest going out with him included. If you don’t make her feel wanted, then someone else will.

Unhappy couple

7 Ways you can appreciate your wife

So many problems in your relationship can be solved by being more appreciative of your wife. If you notice any of the signs above, consider these solutions:

1. Thank her

Just an acknowledgement as simple as saying thank you for everything she does can make a huge difference. Try and say it when she does something, a few words count.

Whether she’s done something for you or the kids. A wife wants to feel her husband appreciates the things she does for the relationship.

Make it a habit of yours to notice the little things. Politeness goes a long way, even in marriages. Your wife will feel better if she knows you’re grateful.

2. Take her out

Let her know you appreciate what she does by taking her out every so often. Going on dates is something you can do at any age and marriage status.

Go on dates with your wife to reintroduce that feeling you had when you first started seeing each other. You’ll rediscover how well you get on and she’ll like spending one on one time with you.

It can be a movie or a nice restaurant. Do something that doesn’t involve a routine day to day experience and she’ll really enjoy herself.

3. Help her

Do something around the house so she doesn’t have to do everything. Husbands are taking care of more of the housework these days, so get with it and do some yourself.

If the children are hard work, you could help with them. Take them somewhere that doesn’t involve your wife so she can do something for herself one afternoon.

Helping is not something to be done once and never again. Make a plan to divide the chores or labor of the household. Then she knows it’s not just going to go back to normal after a few days.

4. Show her love

As long as you do the other 3 things I’ve mentioned above, she’ll be more open to love and affection from you. You’ll be able to rekindle a bit of passion in your marriage.

Start with hugging or kissing to say goodbye or when you’re in front of the TV. In the bedroom, try a massage and build up to something more intimate when she’s ready.

Tell her how you feel about her. Tell her you love her and mean it. Don’t just say it because she said it to you first. You made a commitment to her, so honor it with the words.

5. Buy her something

You’ve clearly neglected your wife if she feels unappreciated, so treat her to something. Maybe those designer shoes or handbag she’s been looking at will look good on her.

This won’t undo what you’ve done but will make her feel good and let her know you think of her. Sometimes a surprise bunch of flowers every so often works wonders.

You and the children could even make something for her as a surprise. This would go down really well and show that the whole family appreciates her.

6. Compliment her

If she’s feeling down and frustrated, then compliment her occasionally. Tell how good she’s done something well or how nice she looks.

If she’s done something to better herself, tell her you notice and that it’s improved her. Listen to what she says because that may be something you haven’t done for a while.

If she can tell you how she feels and you’ll listen and not judge her, she’ll really appreciate it. She’ll like that you’re making an effort to consider her feelings.

7. Cook for her

If you don’t know how to cook, then get her to help you and make a night of it. You could both spend time getting ingredients for something you’ve never tried before.

It’s something you’ll both enjoy and you can start doing it regularly by yourself. It could be your job instead of your wife.

It’s all part of doing things around the house that she normally does. Cooking is something that occupies a big part of the day, so you do it. Or do the laundry instead.

Final thoughts

So maybe you recognize the signs that your wife does indeed feel unappreciated. The first thing you need to do is talk to her and listen.

She probably has a lot she wants to get off her chest about how she feels. The best thing you can do is let her get it out and remember it’s probably your fault.

Tell her what you’re going to do about it and stick to it. It’s the sort of thing that can really affect a marriage so it’s something to take seriously.

You could go through all the 7 ways above to make her feel appreciated. Your wife would really be grateful if you could change and become the person she loved when you married her.

Hopefully it’s not too late and you’ve caught it soon enough. No one likes to feel that they’re being taken for granted and especially not a wife from their husband.

Emma Taylor

I'm a relationship expert with years of experience who's given advice to hundreds of people. I hope you've found some good advice here too.

Recent Posts